It’s time for a correction in my life.
For the last two years, the Ohio Valley Garden Conference has been on my mind. Barbara, my co-chair and I started working on this event in 2010 looking for speakers and a location. Even though I’ve not been constantly working on the conference, it still has been there in the back of my mind.
It’s the past four or five months when that the conference has taken over my life. I’ve spent countless hours trying to fall asleep, making lists, and worrying about details. I feel like I have let friendships dry up, put a hold on gardening, neglected my Dave, and have come to really not like my bossy side.
Now chairing an event is not new to me. In my former life before retiring, I chaired a variety of events including several fundraisers. Back then it was my job and I recall some sleepless nights, but I don’t remember those events taking a toll on me like this conference has.
I remember when Dave and I moved up here and how exhausting it was selling and moving both houses and combining our years of stuff into this one house. But it was a physical tired. The tired I feel right now is not just physical but emotional. I have noticed since the conference Saturday night I have slept much better and hopefully this fatigue will pass, but as I write this I am still so tired.
When I was younger I could “burn the candle at both ends.” I had endless energy – staying up late and getting up early. But that was then. Now is different. It takes me longer to get rested even when I’m just spending several hours weeding and working in the yard. I really have to learn to pace myself better.
So it’s time for a correction. In the next month I am going to seriously evaluate what I am doing and decide what needs to go. I’m fortunate in that this time of my life, I don’t have to punch a clock and can design my day. I plan to continue posting twice a week so you probably won’t see much of a change. Most of the changes will be those activities you don’t know about or I don’t write much about.
It really feels good to make this decision. In the past couple months I’ve turned down two requests for me to chair organizations. For one it was a difficult decision, but I just don’t have anything left. My good friend Ray told me the other day, that it’s just like I’m on an airplane. I need to put the mask on myself before I can help anyone else. So I need to take care of myself which means spending some time playing and spending more time with Dave and my friends.
It’s funny. When we get caught up in the rush, we have blinders on. For me, I keep pushing and pushing and when I stop, like I did yesterday, I all of a sudden see things so clearly. I know where I need to cut and it’s time to start.
That said, the conference was wonderful. We had over 260 attendees, 30 different vendors, and some wonderful, informative speakers. Barbara was an awesome co-chair. We also had a group of wonderful volunteers. Here are just a few pics Dave took from the conference.
I look so serious. It may be because I didn’t want to forget anything and I had been up since 4:30 am!
Paul James was our featured speaker, the host of HGTV’s “Gardening by the Yard,” a great gardening show. In addition to his vast knowledge of gardening, he’s so funny!
We had five other speakers, lots of door prizes, goodie bags, and Tracy Zeller from Tracy Zeller Jewelry gave away a $500 shopping spree. This was a raffle that all of the money we collected went to help pay for the conference.
Linda is hugging Tracy in the picture. I was so happy for her, even though I would have liked to win that spree! Before the conference Tracy was telling me about the new watches that run on solar. Since I have no watches that run anymore, I thought that was what I’d spend the shopping spree on if I won. I still will check them out. My only clock to keep me on time that day was my phone which I kept checking!
I’m looking forward to making more video tutorials, playing with new supplies (just went to Blick’s yesterday and bought a couple things) and smelling some roses. Well, the roses are done for the season, but you know what I mean.
Do you need a correction? This is the perfect time now right before the holidays to make those changes. Thanks for dropping by.
Good for you! I know the pull to take on yet one more commitment… serve one more cause, until your head wants to explode! Since I re-retired 4 years ago, I have been practicing ‘no’ therapy to save me from myself, and I’m not doing too bad! I still participate in events and help where I can, but I have discovered that I’m much healthier and happier when I don’t give away every second of every day to others… I commend you for discovering the importance of caring for yourself and ‘being there’ for your loved ones! Enjoy…
Judy, I’ll also be practicing “no” therapy. Thanks for your comment.
I can certainly relate to your “It’s Time for a Correction”. It does drain everything out of you. I had a wonderful 4 years chairing the committee but it does take it’s toll after a while. I do find myself having to continue to make corrections thru out the year or else I’ll be back in the same situation again. Thanks for giving me a little reminder of what my priorities are.
Great post. Hope you get to relax some now!
Lynda, I wish you rest, refreshment, and restoration. I can identify with your decision to say YES to activities which give you joy. I see life as a series of trade-offs, and when I say YES to some , it means that others fall away, sometimes temporarily and sometimes permanently. Peace and REST to you today! Susan
Ann, I’m glad that you’ve taken a break from the plant sale. It’s hard to say no especially if it’s something we love. My writing this was not only to help me but to remind others. Thanks for commenting.
Annette, Thanks. I’m going to do that for sure!
Susan, It is so true that when we say yes, other things need to fall away. Thanks for your sweet comment.
Lynda, good for you! I’m younger than you and I still need to remind myself to take breaks and to not want to do everything (and all at once) because it will be better for me and my family and friends if I don’t overtire myself. A hard lesson to learn. Do let us know how you get on!
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Lynda, I was in your same boat several years ago. That January my resolution was to say No first and tell the requester “If I call you back in three days and say Yes to your request – good for you” but if you don’t hear from me in three days consider it a No. It was a turning point in my life to not be volunteering my life away. I realized that when people ask you to volunteer for them- they don’t always want YOU, they need a body to fill a spot. And when you say No they just move on down the volunteer list and ask someone else. I’ve been on that end of the spectrum too and realized sometimes I didn’t care who helped me – I only needed a body.
Lately I do feel like I’m being overwhelmed- by trying to figure out the nursing home situation for husband’s 93 year old mother. Either I don’t sleep or feel like a truck has run over me. Either way it’s not good.
Carla, Thanks. I’m sorry to hear about Ed’s mom. I can see where that would overwhelm you. Hope the watercolor class is going well. Thanks for stopping by.
Good thinking and good decision. Take care of yourself. I’ll keep watching here!
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